From deep space to deep underground,BioWare’s vast array of published games explore several different locations. But while some are solid and secure home bases, like the Normandy in theMass Effectseries and Skyhold inDragon Age: Inquisition, some are… not quite as safe.
Which makes sense, of course: saving the world (or universe, inMass Effect’s case), isn’t exactly a walk through the park. For residents of these various universes, however, which places the protagonist visits are certifiably the most badly-rated places to live for fantasy homeowners?
The planet of Coda is survivable, but not always livable; with snow that burns everything it touches and earthquakes abound, the seasonal weather is a gamble on what residents will see each day. Apart from that, theunfortunately canceledAnthem’sCoda is quite lovely — it features ambling clouds and beautiful sunsets, as well as mostly non-violent flora and fauna. The only thing that residents need to worry about is whether the freelancers that come to visit will take care of the threatening Cataclysms that cause the wild weather changes.
It’s dark, it’s damp, and for anyone but dwarves, it’s a little cramped. The Deep Roads shows up time and time again forDragon Agefans, and while it isn’t really that bad, it’s certainly not as lovely as somewhere like Orlais or The Hinterlands. Filled with dwarven history and plenty of loot, the Deep Roads are great for those eager to sacrifice the sunlight for some underground archaeology work, but with the threat of Darkspawn ever on the horizon, the housing market in the Deep Roads probably isn’t doing so hot.
While Kirkwall’s city walls are home to grand storytellers like Varric Tethras and Guard-Captain Aveline Vallen, its infamy did not come without flaws: plagues of blood magic and general lunacy have made the city of Kirkwall a major spot for conflict, especially when playing asthe Champion of Kirkwall, Hawke. The Veil is thin in Kirkwall, meaning a more magical and demonic presence has made the city much more likely to endure Darkspawn attacks. However, Kirkwall’s also famous for delicious crab cakes, so… you win some, you lose some.
With roaming desert plains, historical landmarks, and plenty of fresh water if one knows where to look, the Western Approach is perfect for daring adventurers looking for some excitement right outside their door. However, there’s an emphasis on daring here; the land is filled with violent creatures to fight, from chattering hyenas to the Abyssal High Dragon. Andall of that sand… For those looking for an action-adventure lifestyle, the Western Approach is the place to be! However, for the more typical homeowner in search of safety, stick to Val Royeaux.
Omega Space Station was originally an asteroid rich in ore, but has since become a home base to thieves, outlaws, drugs, and lots of other things the Homeowner’s Association probably shouldn’t know about.
Mercenary groups run the station itself untilShepardcomes along to restore some sort of order to this lawless land. With several districts to choose from and several more gangs to ally with, Omega Space Station is somewhere for only the bravest of people to live.
Noveria is the perfect place to visit near the holidays: a frozen wasteland that’s presumably uninhabited by anyone but the most dedicated scientists. With only research labs and plenty of snow, this planet isn’t the most populated, which would make for delightfully quiet nights during this eternal winter. The labs are home to some of the most high-tech research and intel yet — a magnet for those interested in their results! However, without much else going for it, most are too paranoid to so much as visit… let alone live there long-term.
Dirty, dark, and infested with Rakghouls, the Undercity is home to criminals and outcasts from the Tarisian Civil War, forced underground after their defeat in the rebellion.
With threatening diseases on the horizon and rebellion strictly admonished, the Undercity isn’t the smartest place to own a home, unless one finds themselves forced into it. Danger lurks around every corner, but at least those with lightsabers will be able to see it coming.
BioWare’sforgotten foray into handheld gamingcame withSonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood.Home of Knuckles the Echidna and the Master Emerald, Angel Island is tiny but mighty; lush forests and a mysterious temple take up the island’s expanse, and there’s not a lot of room for the development of new homes. Along with that, Angel Island is a magnet for bandits trying to steal the Master Emerald — which is the only thing keeping Angel Island aloft in the sky. It’s a high-risk, high-reward sort of living arrangement, but on the plus side, Knuckles would make a great neighbor!
